My hypocrisy, His wreckless love

There are Ten Commandments, my friends, and I’ve broken nearly all of them at one point or another. Sometimes repeatedly.

I had a real moment of truth in the not-so-distant past, while I was sitting with a small group of friends during fellowship at my church. My moment of truth had to do with the hypocrisy of claiming to be a Christian, yet consistently subscribing to the “do as I say, not as I do” way of living. Is this where you’re at these days? I know I am not alone.

I was raised Roman Catholic, converted to Nazarene in 2007, and ended up non-denominational in 2012 so, for the past thirty years of my life, I have called myself a “Christian” alongside the rest of the estimated 33% of world-wide peoples who claim to be Christians. I can’t help but wonder how many of those 33% of people struggle daily, as I do, with self-hypocrisy.

I’m one of those “Christians” who screams at the kids during the hour right before we leave the house on Sundays to go to our church. And then, when my kids and I arrive ten minutes late to service, put on my happy face and pretend like my ugly language and behavior had never happened. I drop the “f-bomb” on a regular basis, and I have coveted many things in my life. Sitting here, just meditating upon all this, I am reminded of a poem I ran across some time ago:

There are little eyes upon you and they’re watching night and day.
There are little ears that quickly take in every word you say.
There are little hands all eager to do anything you do;
And a little boy who’s dreaming of the day he’ll be like you.
You’re the little fellow’s idol, you’re the wisest of the wise.
In his little mind about you no suspicions ever rise.
He believes in you devoutly, holds all you say and do;
He will say and do, in your way when he’s grown up just like you.
There’s a wide-eyed little fellow who believes you’re always right;
And his eyes are always opened, and he watches day and night.
You are setting an example every day in all you do;
For the little boy who’s waiting to grow up to be like you.

In short, it truly matters whether what I say and what I do are aligned because my kids are watching my every move. Not only am I being hypocritical, it’s also very selfish of me to do the things that I continue to do, because I want my true values and priorities to be clear to my kids every day. Friends, I can say all I want to about how important church and reading the Bible is, but if my actions display something else… that’s what my kids will take notice of. Reading the Bible regularly, praying continually, apologizing and showing true repentance, treating others with love, gentleness and respect, will all set an example and reinforce lessons my kids are learning by regularly attending youth group.

Someone I admire very much is Dr. Charles Stanley, whom you might have seen on television or heard on the radio. During one of his teachings, Dr. Stanley discusses how God wants to break our self-will by targeting the areas of our life that do not honor Him. Pride, ignorance, fear, worldly entanglements, unhealthy relationships, rebelliousness… these are ways that we resist brokenness, and I’ve been guilty in all these ways. What about you? If you are claiming to be a “Christian”, are you resisting brokenness? Do you ever feel hypocritical? I’m curious to see who else is going through this with me.

my hypocrisy his reckless love

I “speak” in song lyrics; when I can’t find the words to express myself, I listen closely to a song and use that to reach sanity in any given situation. I’ve been told that if I was in “a mood,” all someone had to do was turn the radio dial to a beautiful song and everything would be rainbows and butterflies for me.

Whole Heart Album CoverFriends, I’ve found a number of beautiful songs in Passion music. This song, in particular, proves I’m a sucker for a piano and a pretty voice. Let me tell you this: despite calling myself a Christian and living out unintentional hypocrisy for my entire life, I never really understood the depth of God’s love for me — until I heard this song for the first time. The lyrics spoke to my heart! As a mother who would do ANYTHING for her children, THIS was something I could wrap my head around. FINALLY, I could understand wreckless love! He is so, so good to me.

Will you join me in restating our faith and a desire to be more like JesusPassion: Whole Heart is the new live album from Passion—captured at Passion Conference 2018 in Atlanta, GA. You will sing along with Kristian Stanfill, Melodie Malone, Sean Curran, Matt Redman, Crowder, and more of our favorite Christian artists. Preview and purchase the album. Rooted out of the Passion movement, Passion music is committed to leading people towards renewed intimacy with God and fresh encounters of worship.

What song reels you in every time and forces your hand to crank up the volume on your stereo and your voice to sing loud enough to make the neighbors stare out their front windows at you? Your response will give you a chance to receive the entire Whole Heart album at no cost!

Disclosure (in accordance with the FTC’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising”):

Many thanks to Propeller Consulting, LLC for providing this prize for the giveaway. Choice of winners and opinions are 100% my own and NOT influenced by monetary compensation. I did receive a sample of the product in exchange for this review and post.

Only one entrant per mailing address, per giveaway. If you have won a prize from our sponsor Propeller / FlyBy Promotions in the last 30 days on the same blog, you are not eligible to win. Or if you have won the same prize on another blog, you are not eligible to win it again. Winner is subject to eligibility verification.

Portions of this post were originally published at New Jersey Moms Blog. You can listen to Passion music at

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